Friday, January 22, 2010

Signs I am slowly losing it!

So guys, as most of you may know, I am slowly losing it! --> My sanity that is! :-P

Y'all seem to get a kick out of the stupid things I do from day to day so I thought I'd make a post about it! haha... and of course I'll add things as the days go on! ;)

And, to make myself feel better, we'll just start with the thing I did yesterday, and go from there. Sound good? Great! So here it goes...something I'd like to call:

How to know if you're losing it:
  1. You forget to shave one of your legs, and wear capris.
  2. You iron a pair of dirty sweat pants -- before you realize they're dirty, and that they're sweat pants! 
More to come, of course... Stay tuned! haha

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Date day!

For a couple weeks, Alex has been asking me when I'd have some free time. School hadn't even started yet & already I had none! Even my Christmas break only seemed like a couple days of free time. So, I picked a day a week or so in advance that I didn't have anything really on the agenda yet (except the return of Grey's Anatomy). Somehow, some way, a week later the day came and I still didn't have anything on my agenda! So, all went according to (Alex's) plan.

Let me just say, in case you don't already know this tid-bit about me, I don't have much patience. It's something I pray for, a lot. I don't like being in the dark, or waiting, so, Alex purposefully keeping me in the dark for over a week about our plans for the day really drove me bananas! But he wanted to keep it a surprise, so, "I let him." haha

Anyways, he tells me that we HAVE to leave by 11:00 and for me to be ready to walk out of the door then. Well, if you know me then you know this did not happen. 11:15 and we leave, and decide to take my car (which is about 2,000 miles overdue for an oil change and needed gas) so, take a little time to pump gas & check the oil, ya know, make sure I still have some! & then we were off....

Rewind! So, Alex walks in my apartment and immediately I start hounding him about what we're doing. He says, "Okay, I'll tell you, but, even if you don't like the idea, pretend like you do." Then he tells me he's taking me to the Biltmore House! My face lit up and I think I clapped, haha.... and I was not pretending. I have always wanted to go to the Biltmore House and I don't know why I have never been. Things like that just interest me. :) I was pumped!

We had such a good time! It was a perfect day with perfect weather! You know me...of course I got some pictures!

I even managed to sneak some pictures inside the Biltmore House, when one of the 638,751 employees weren't standing around the corner. Here are some of our favorites...
the...game room?? pretty nice for 1900ish.





a beautiful view of the mountains!

cool paintings on the basement walls...



Alex is obsessed with all things superhero so, I took this picture for him. Why it was painted on the basement wall of the Biltmore House, I don't know...


& Alex's favorite...the pool!

I didn't get to take any pictures of the beautiful bedrooms. And the garden was all dead and everything since it is January so, we'll have to make another trip in the Spring!  :) I was also super fascinated with the ceilings in all the rooms...I would LOVE living in a place with such beautiful architecture. [<--saying this is a definite sign I am getting older.]

Alex gets an A+ for date day! :)

Thursday, January 7, 2010

My first challenge of 2010!

So, for reasons I’ll keep to myself, I have ONE month to get into a ROUTINE & to kick some nasty habits of mine! One month isn’t long so…I will have to find a way to stay focused!

I don’t know how much I weigh (yet). I don’t know if I care, or if I want to know… I think a lot of girls/people focus too much on their weight and the actual number. In case you didn’t know, your weight fluctuates throughout the day, so unless you’re going to weight yourself at home every morning the second you wake up, then weighing yourself isn’t the best idea ever. It’s healthy to lose 1-2 pounds a week and if you lose weight at that pace, you’re a lot more likely to keep it off! So, that is my goal! I don’t think I’ll need a scale; I think that I’ll be able to see and feel the results I want with time and that’s all I ask for! The thought of taking a “before” picture crossed my mind too, haha…you know, the unflattering body poses, complete with bad hair and a frown on my face! IF I do, you definitely won’t see it until way, way later when I see the results I want & can take an a decent “after” picture! ;)

I have free access to the gym on campus so, I have no excuse! Other than the fact I would LIKE to go sometime before noon everyday and Lenoir-Rhyne’s gym has some crazy hours (6-8 am & noon-11pm!) I guess I will have to figure something out.

Weight loss is not my objective here…the whole point of the month-long “thing” I have going on here is about habits (particularly my bad ones!) I’ll admit…I have a number of them! I heard it’s best not to try to kick them all at the same time so, I won’t try! ;)

My main goals are:
1. Get on a healthy & (keyword here:) steady sleep schedule
2. Eat 5 small meals a day…3 plus 2 HEALTHY snacks!
3. (Starting small here -->) Only drinking ONE soft drink a day!
4. Hitting up the gym at least 4-5 times a week…for at least one hour!

You gotta start small. :) Now, I’ve already purchased my “healthy snacks” – which will definitely come in handy when I’m stuck in class on Wednesdays for 4-5 hours at a time! And there is currently NO soft drinks in my refrigerator! (Confession: I did purchase two 2 liters of Mtn Dew, you know, just in case… but they are room temperature in my coat closet!)

Now, I’ve been going to bed at decent times (compared to my previous 3ish a.m. bedtime) lately & having to get up to go work at the gym from 6-8 a.m. really does help to get you in the habit! Too bad I could always come back home & sleep til noon (& sometimes do)!

That’s another thing! I can’t be sleeping in like I did. I mean, I usually didn’t sleep past noon, but still…I need to pick a decent time to get up, and GET UP at that time. No more of this snooze for 10 more minutes, then another, then another junk!

Ok…I’ve talked enough. It’s time to walk the walk. It’s 9:45 p.m. & I’ve gotta work at 6 in the morning so, we’ll see how it goes! I’ll keep you posted! ;)

WISH ME LUCK! :-D

Friday, January 1, 2010

Reflecting on 2009

Where did 2009 go? Man it flew by! I say that...but a lot happened in 2009! I learned so many things this past year. I probably say that every year, but, I DO mean it! :) I was also blessed tremendously in 2009. Looking back, I can't even begin to tell you all the things God did for me. (But, I'll try!) First and foremost, God's timing could not be more perfect! I can not express how lucky I am to have had Him place Alex back into my life, for good! I am (still) so in love with that man of God & I can not wait to see what 2010 has in store for us! Alex graduated in May and has been searching for a job at least since then! He's been unsuccessful in finding a job and I am so proud of him. He keeps his head up and has the most positive attitude. He knows that God has something perfect for him out there and it's only a matter of time before He presents Alex with that opportunity. Until then, God has provided various odd jobs for him to provide him some gas money at least! That boy comes to Hickory ALL the time and I am SO appreciative!! During this time though, Alex has searched after the heart of his Father and has dove into the Word of the Lord and boy does it show! I am on a daily basis proud of the man he is, and the man he is turning into. I do believe that with the help of the Lord, people CAN change. As you all know, Alex & I have had our ups and downs, times together and times apart. Throughout it all, I've learned to stay true to your heart and that (how cliche is this?) "if it's meant to be, IT WILL BE." Either way, the past is in the past now and 2009 was a great year for us, and again, I can't wait to see what 2010 has in store for us!


Now, if you know me, you know that I have to make that money! I do not have the luxury of being able to take "time off" or anything of the sort. Bills have to be paid, right? The Lord has always been successful providing me employment and 2009 was NO exception! It all started in JANUARY and by the last week of JULY, the Lord has answered my prayers!! It was stressful but I learned that I need to stay faithful and the Lord WILL provide! In the mean time, God provided me temporary jobs to pay the bills & gain some learning experiences! I am very appreciative of all the people that prayed for me during that time. It obviously helped! I have never loved a job more!

Meet my staff! I think this pic is such an exact replica of our personalities!

 and meet my fellow RDs:


And lastly, learning experiences...I mentioned those, right? They definitely were a definitive part of 2009 and I will be forever grateful for those as well! I won't go into what all I learned, but I can tell you that I will take everything I learned from the beginning to the end of the past year and use it in the upcoming year(s).

I don't believe in New Years resolutions. If I ever made them, they didn't work out. I just want to work on making this year & every year after that better! My first Facebook photo album of the year is titled, "making 2010 the best year ever.." & that's simply what I'm doing! I'm going to do some prioritizing, some sifting, and work on devoting my time & energy into what helps me do that. I'm focusing on God, my family, Alex, & my true friends. If I do that, everything else will fall into place. I'm sure of it. :)

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Done! Finished! Finito! Fin! :-D

I made it! I am officially done with my first full semester of graduate school. Praise the Lord! I never thought I would see the light at the end of the tunnel that is this semester. In a matter of 4 days last week I wrote FIFTY pages of essay-type things. FIFTY! That's insane! I thought I would go crazy. I took about a week long mental vacation and then had to be back at it. I cranked another 10 pages out, had class tonight (a week after "the last day of classes"), and feel SO relieved! I really don't know what to do with myself. I mean, there is always something I should be doing. I can't go home for Christmas until Monday, the 21st, so, there is RD work to be done, and DEFINITELY cleaning that has been neglected lately with all this paper writing! So, I'll need to get on that. But tonight, I'm just not feeling it. I took a nice, long, MUCH needed shower after I got out of class, and I might just get in the bed with a book at 8pm and see how long it takes me to drift off to dreamland! :)

I've gotta get up crazy early in the morning. I'm working at the gym 6-8 AM! Trying to make a little extra holiday $$$! I'm already counting down the days until February 17ish when I get my next financial aid refund check. :/ Don't get me started...

I don't know what else to tell you right now- other than I am seriously sleep-deprived, smelling beautifully, and so so SOOOO happy that this semester is over with! Oh, and did I tell you that I am taking four classes next semester? We'll see how it goes....

Until then, I'm going to try to have a very merry CHRISTmas with my family, friends, and special someone! :) I hope you will all do the same.

Friday, November 13, 2009

The school part of graduate school--

Omgosh. Grad school is definitely doing a job job kicking my butt right now.

I have learned that you can't just take pride in finalizing your to-do list. You have to get things done so your to-do list gets smaller or smaller. The thing with me is, I'll keep adding crap to the list. Just so I won't forget down the road.

My to-do list currently has on it: work on paper due next week and finish painting apartment (which we all know probably won't happen until the summer). Who am I kidding?

I do take pride in the fact that our STUPID paper was completed tonight at 11pm. It's due tomorrow. Figures. It's so hard to get us all together. We are all adults, living individual lives. It's not like undergrad when the majority of students don't have full time jobs, or children, or spouses. It is seriously difficult to get a group of 4 or 5 of us together to work on a group project. But we did it! We spent 7 hours together this work working on it...not counting the time we worked on it individually. Group papers are the worst I think. Ahh but it's DONE! :-D

November 18th is a big day for me. I have tons of crap due that day - tons! Including a paper on a book I haven't read yet. (Date check - yes, it's Nov 13th!) I heard it's a good one though ... one about the experiences of living in a concentration camp during WWII. I've been told the main point of the book is "it's not about what happens to you, but how you react to what happens to you" so .. I'm sure I'll finish it quickly! I better, huh?!

After that I'll only have a couple more assignments due for the semester and the Monday & Tuesday before Thanksgiving I'll get TWO out of 3 of my FINALS to start completing. Grad school finals are awesome. Yeah, they're cumulative, which sucks, but they're take home, open book essay finals! The sooner I start, the sooner I'll get done .. which means the sooner I can get back to stalking people on Facebook! ;) juuuuuuuuuust kidding. (right.) No, but I do miss it...

On a different note - I registered for classes already! November 9th. I thought that was kinda early but maybe I'm wrong. I am taking 3 classes right now (9 hours), all of which are kicking my butt, but to my defense, only because I procrastinated. So what do I do? I sign up for FOUR next semester! You know me, trying to get out of school as soon as I can! At the going rate I'll graduate December of 2011. Gah, that seems forever away but I'm sure it'll be here before I know it. Anyways, four classes. I was going to take a week-long class in December on spirituality but I think I'll take that time to go home and have a break with my family. Oh! AND .. one of those classes next semester is only 3 weekends long. How awesome is that? 3 weekends and I'm done. Grad school DOES have its perks!

I am so blessed to be here. I try to thank God every day for the job He gave me here and for the opportunity to further my education, for free, because otherwise I'd just have a Psychology degree and I'd either be doing something I hate or working a job that doesn't require a college education. He DEFINITELY was keeping His eye out for me! I have no doubt in my mind. Thank you, Lord! :)

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

peace out, facebook!

So, I blame Facebook for distracting me the most. As a result, I have decided to get off Facebook until all my work for the semester is complete! I did this once before, you know, when you temporarily deactivate your Facebook, knowing that the minute you sign back in everything pops back up, as if you never left. Yeah, I tried that-- I was productive an entire day and then later that night, what did I do? I signed back on! I have absolutely no self-control. Or, I didn't. Who knew that all it would take to get me off and focusing on things that are more important was a bribe? I didn't, but it's seemed to work so far. Okay, okay....so I'm only two days in! It's been a pretty productive two days!

Yesterday I was pretty proud of myself. I wrote a nine page paper in APA format with 20 references, ate in the caf twice (not my norm), had a salad instead of something greasy, and got water instead of Mountain Dew, twice! If you know me, you're probably proud too- haha... I'm working on productivity! There are so many things I need to do but so also so many things I WANT to do. So, I'm getting items in my to-do list marked off one by one, less slowly and more surely than usual! I must say, I like this no Facebook idea.

Sidenote: if for some reason you see a status update or something, it's ONLY because I said that I would ONLY and I mean ONLY get on Facebook to post updates to this blog and updates to my devotion Facebook group, "ten minutes to get you through your day." I'm staying true to my vow and not just because I was promised one of my favorite TV shows on DVD. :)

Enjoy your Tuesday!

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Welcome to Hickory, NC!

Ahh! My sleep schedule is SO messed up! I'll probably end up blogging late at night while I have a ton of energy. Living back in the residence halls have really screwed up my already pretty messed up sleep schedule. And I really reallly really wish I'd work on that more- because it really messes up your day!

About that---as most of you know, I've moved to Hickory, NC. I got a great job too! I am now a Resident Director at Lenoir-Rhyne University. I live in an apartment in Isenhour Hall on campus, one of the primarily freshmen "dorms." (Speaking of my apartment, it was a definite fixer-upper and I took before and after pictures! I'll have to share them another day!) Anyways, my job is to primarily oversee the RAs in the building (who, by the way are SUCH an awesome staff!) and the building itself, and handle any mishaps that happen along the way. Let me tell you, I LOVE IT! Isenhour Hall is crazy. My residents are crazy and I'm enjoying getting to know them this year. I hate hate hate the sound of my doorbell but I don't mind it when I hear it at 2 in the morning if someone is having issues.  It's such a great job to have while I work on my Masters. I can use what I learn in classes immediately and directly with students, which is great!

Again, in case you hadn't heard, I'm working here at LR on my Masters in Counseling. I couldn't decide which type of counseling I wanted to do once I had my Masters and I was seriously struggling with that decision. Usually, graduate schools have you decide which type of counseling you want to pursue: agency/community or school. Well, long story short: Lenoir-Rhyne has an awesome program that lets you do both! So, I added 12 hours to my course load and will be able to pursue a counseling career in either some type of community counseling or in a school! With the economy the way it is, the more doors I'll be able to open the better! And then there's the fact that I still have no idea what I actually WANT to do! So, I have about 2 years to figure it out. :)

I think I've figured that I'll graduate in August or December of 2011. I took two classes this summer and plan to take one in December. It's crazy--those 3 classes add up to only a total of 16 days but those 3 classes alone will knock a whole SEMESTER off my graduation date! You know me....trying to get in and out as soon as possible so I can move on to the next stage! :) However, my LR experience is a lot different from my experience in undergrad at Appalachian. I may blog about that later. :) Therefore I wouldn't mind staying longer if I had to/could. Ok, I've lived here like TWO months...I need to stop. I'm hoping things don't change but I need to stop counting my chickens. Hopefully I'll remember to keep blogging and give you an update on it later on, once I've experienced it all a little more.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Dreams & the Devil, my personal story...

So, you may or may not have heard me talk about this before but, either way, I have an update.

So you know how some people dream, and sometimes they remember their dreams and sometimes they don't? Well, I can't remember a time when I have remembered a "good" dream. If I remember a dream, it's because it probably scarred me for life. I mean, I know all about REM sleep, and I know I dream multiple dreams a night. However, if I realize I'm dreaming, if I'm awoken from a dream, or if I even remember a dream-- it's because it scared the living daylights out of me.

My nightmares usually involve someone I love dying, or someone trying to kill me, or the world ending. Crazy! Right?? But you can see how this would freak me out now...

Having lunch with a friend one day, we got on the topic of dreams and I was telling them about my nightmares. She asked me if I've always had them, or if they recently started occurring. I got to thinking about it... I thought they had recently began occurring throughout the past couple years or so, which had been a pretty tough time for me. Once I starting thinking back, it hit me! I had been suffering from these nightmares since I can remember. (Ironic, ha).

A long time ago my family used to live in Iron Station, NC. We moved out of that house when I was in the 2nd grade, therefore I figured out that I started having recurring nightmares somewhere between the ages of 3 and 7. I vividly remember not wanting to go to sleep in fear of having another nightmare. My brother, Pat, & I shared a bedroom at the time and I remember my dad putting me to sleep in my bed. He picked one of Pat's toys up off the floor-- a foot-tall, hard as a rock Ninja Turtle-- & I remember him telling me that if I slept with the Ninja Turtle, he'd fight off my bad dreams.

Do y'all know how long I slept with that Ninja Turtle? I was paranoid! I slept with it every night until finally my parents realized that my "comfort item" wasn't a blanket or a stuffed animal, but a foot-tall, hard as a rock Ninja Turtle! They bought me this cat to replace the turtle. The movie "Andre" had just come out (the movie about a girl who raised a pet seal...y'all remember that?!) .. Well, I named the cat Andre and took that thing everywhere I spent the night. I TRULY believed that if that cat wasn't covered up in the bed next to me I would have a bad dream. I honestly, sadly to say, slept with that thing PROBABLY until I was in 8th grade. I remember in middle school doing nightly experiments, sleeping with the cat and not sleeping with the cat, to see if I would have a nightmare or not. I promise you-- if that cat was not by my side, I had a nightmare, sure as the devil! That freaked me out and that is how I justify to myself why I slept with the cat until I was in the 8th grade.

Now I can't remember why I quit sleeping with the cat, and I couldn't even tell you where it is today (which saddens me a bit)...but I'm sure it had something to do with me entering high school. It also might have something to do with the fact that one night I spent the night at Ashleigh Woody's house and forgot the cat. I called my mom, freaking out, and asked her to come bring it to me. She for whatever reason wouldn't, and I could hear my dad joking in the background saying, "here kitty kitty...", acting like he was going to kill my cat or something horrible. I don't know, but I remember getting really upset, and afterwards I probably just wondered why in the world I was getting so upset over a stuffed cat!

Either way, (sorry--this story's getting longer than I anticipated) I don't sleep with a comfort item and haven't since then. But, I still have these crazy nightmares! I don't watch scary movies anymore because I'm sure they'll trigger some unconscious (or obviously conscious) fear of mine and I'll have nightmares for a month or something crazy.

Anywho-- some friends and I were talking about dream therapy at lunch the other day and I told them my crazy cat story. I told them how it was all in my head and if I slept with the cat growing up I never had a bad dream, but if I didn't then I would for sure have one.

A couple nights later, I couldn't sleep so I started reading my new Bible. It's a NIV & The Message Parallel Bible & I love it! Anyways, I just opened it up and started reading The Message.

PLEASE LOOK AT WHAT I FOUND---

"Dear friend, guard clear Thinking and common sense with your life; don't for a minute lose sight of them. They'll keep your soul alive and well, they'll keep you fit and attractive. You'll travel safely, you'll neither tire nor trip. **NOW HERE'S MY FAVORITE PART -->** You'll take afternoon naps without a worry, you'll enjoy a good night's sleep. NO NEED TO PANIC OVER ALARMS OR SURPRISES, OR PREDICTIONS THAT DOOMSDAY'S JUST AROUND THE CORNER, BECAUSE GOD WILL BE RIGHT THERE WITH YOU; HE'LL KEEP YOU SAFE AND SOUND." (Proverbs 3: 21-26, The Message)

Obviously that spoke right to my heart. I worry and I worry and I worry. I pray every night before I go to bed that the Lord blesses me with sweet dreams, or at least no nightmares. I try not to take dreams seriously but they honestly make me very anxious and weary. It's funny because the Lord says in the Bible NOT to anxious OR weary! The Devil attacks you, day and night, and obviously whether you are asleep or not. He'll find a way to get to you- He knows you're destined for great things and therefore will get a head start on attempting to bring you down whenever possible.

I now go to bed worry-free. I know the Lord is protecting me.
I'm sure some of you have experienced a similar situation. I'm sure some of you can relate. I just wanted to share this with you and let you know that God is in control. Give your life to Him and He will take that life-long burden off your shoulders. "Cast your anxieties on Him because He cares for you." :)

And if you made it all the way to the end, I appreciate you listening. :) Be blessed!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

I've Learned:

I've learned
that you cannot make someone love you.
All you can do is
be someone who can be loved.
The rest is up to them.

I've learned -
that no matter how much I care,
some people just don't care back.

I've learned -
that it takes years to build up trust,
and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned -
that it's not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned -
that you can get by on charm
for about fifteen minutes.
After that, you'd better know something.

I've learned -
that you shouldn't compare
yourself to the best others can do
but to the best you can do.

I've learned -
that it's not what happens to people
that's important. It's what they do about it.

I've learned -
that you can do something in an instant
that will give you heartache for life.


I've learned -
that no matter how thin you slice it,
there are always two sides.

I've learned -
that it's taking me a long time
to become the person I want to be.


I've learned -
that it's a lot easier
to react than it is to think.

I've learned -
that you should always leave
loved ones with loving words.
It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned -
that you can keep going
long after you think you can't.

I've learned -
that we are responsible for what we do,
no matter how we feel.

I've learned -
that either you control your attitude
or it controls you.

I've learned -
that regardless of how hot and steamy
a relationship is at first,
the passion fades and there had better be
something else to take its place.

I've learned -
that heroes are the people
who do what has to be done
when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.

I've learned -
that learning to forgive takes practice.

I've learned -
that there are people who love you dearly,
but just don't know how to show it.

I've learned -
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned -
that my best friend and I can do anything
or nothing and have the best time.

I've learned -
that sometimes the people you expect
to kick you when you're down
will be the ones to help you get back up.

I've learned -
that sometimes when I'm angry
I have the right to be angry,
but that doesn't give me
the right to be cruel.

I've learned -
that true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.

I've learned -
that just because someone doesn't love you
the way you want them to doesn't mean
they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned -
that maturity has more to do with
what types of experiences you've had
and what you've learned from them
and less to do with how many
birthdays you've celebrated.

I've learned _
that you should never tell a child
their dreams are unlikely or outlandish.
Few things are more humiliating, and
what a tragedy it would be
if they believed it.

I've learned -
that your family won't always
be there for you. It may seem funny,
but people you aren't related to
can take care of you and love you
and teach you to trust people again.
Families aren't biological.

I've learned -
that no matter how good a friend is,
they're going to hurt you
every once in a while
and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned -
that it isn't always enough
to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes you have to learn
to forgive yourself.

I've learned -
that no matter how bad
your heart is broken
the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I've learned -
that our background and circumstances
may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned -
that sometimes when my friends fight,
I'm forced to choose sides
even when I don't want to.

I've learned -
that just because two people argue,
it doesn't mean they don't love each other
And just because they don't argue,
it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned -
that sometimes you have to put
the individual ahead of their actions.

I've learned -
that we don't have to change friends
if we understand that friends change.

I've learned -
that you shouldn't be so
eager to find out a secret.
It could change your life forever.

I've learned -
that two people can look
at the exact same thing
and see something totally different.

I've learned -
that no matter how you try to protect
your children, they will eventually get hurt
and you will hurt in the process.

I've learned -
that there are many ways of falling
and staying in love.

I've learned -
that no matter the consequences,
those who are honest with themselves
get farther in life.

I've learned -
that no matter how many friends you have,
if you are their pillar you will feel lonely
and lost at the times you need them most.

I've learned -
that your life can be changed
in a matter of hours
by people who don't even know you.

I've learned -
that even when you think
you have no more to give,
when a friend cries out to you,
you will find the strength to help.

I've learned -
that writing, as well as talking,
can ease emotional pains.

I've learned -
that the paradigm we live in
is not all that is offered to us.

I've learned -
that credentials on the wall
do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned -
that the people you care most about in life
are taken from you too soon.

I've learned -
that although the word "love"
can have many different meanings,
it loses value when overly used.

I've learned -
that it's hard to determine
where to draw the line
between being nice and
not hurting people's feelings
and standing up for what you believe.

copyrights to: Kathy Kane Hansen

Monday, July 14, 2008

true love never dies

In 50 years I hope to be just as in love as my grandparents were today. :)

My Pawpaw told me about how my Mawmaw had red high heel shoes on when they first met, "and a red dress too!" ... and how he thought, "I'd like to marry a girl like that." ... and then he said "and I did! I got to marry a girl like that." ... awwwwwwww now HOW adorable is he?? Really??

Please note how he said he "GOT" to marry a girl like that. He considered it a privilege. And that my friend is how it should be...always.

She told me about when he proposed and how he still remembers certain special moments from thier past, like the time they first met, and how thoughtful that was of him.... She said, "People will never forget the thoughtful things you do for them." How true.

I am actually blessed to be dating a guy that remembers those little important things- the time we first held hands, the DATE we first kissed, the time we first cuddled, the first movie we watched, etc. etc. ... I am a lucky girl :)

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Out of the mouth of Pawpaw

"No matter what happens, be positive." - My Pawpaw 

just wanted to remember this one day :)

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

"God may not always give us answers, but He always gives us grace.."

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. --Matthew 11:28

And He will give you all you need from day to day if you live for Him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern. --Matthew 6:33

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. --Philippians 4:6

In the middle of the turbulence surrounding you
These trying times are so hard to endure
In the middle of what seems to be your darkest hour
Hold fast your heart and be assured
This too shall pass
Like every night that's come before it
He'll never give you more than you can bare
This too shall pass
So in this thought be comforted 'fore it's in His Hands
This too shall pass

Father knows the tears you cry before they fall
He feels your pain
His heart and yours are one
Father knows that sorrow's heavy chains are strong
But with His strength, you'll overcome
So set your eyes, set them on the mountain
And lift your head up to the sky
And let His arms of love surround you
Let him take you to the other side

This too shall pass..

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Leaving Boone

PD & Barbs are coming to Boonetown tomorrow to move all my junk out of the apt.
that'll be lovely.

and i just realized tonite how much i'm gonna miss my boone friends :( ...katie, vanessa, keara, liz, jeremy, the alpha sig boys... & of course my lovely roomies. :) ...all those people. i've mostly hung around people from lincolnton during my 3 years here. but the few close friends i have made helped me get through the toughest year of my life and for that i am forever grateful. <3 i am a lucky, lucky girl.

Monday, April 28, 2008

Encouragment

When I find myself overwhelmed with schoolwork and everything else going on in life...I think about these two verses.

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer... *Romans 12:12
Don't be afraid. Just stand where you are and watch the Lord rescue you... *Exodus 14:13

Nothing is in your power. Everything is in God's hands. Things are going to work out the way He intended, regardless of your efforts to have things your own way. If you're lucky, you will wish for that in which He gives you. But, your best bet is to just realize that He is in control, and pray for His will in your life. He will not give you anything you can't handle. Take things day by day, continue to pray, and be hopeful. Things will work out exactly are they are supposed to. Just give it time. :)

Monday, January 15, 2007

Good Advice

"There are things you'd love to hear
that you would never hear
from the person whom you would like to hear them from,
but don't be so deaf as not to hear it
from the one who says it from his heart."

Friday, October 6, 2006

He's Just Not That Into You

SOME OF MY FAVORITE EXCERPTS FROM "He's Just Not That Into You":::


If a (sane) guy really likes you, there ain't nothing that's going to get in his way. And if he's not sane, why would you want him?

We are all beautiful, smart, funny women, and we shouldn't be wasting our time figuring out why a guy isn't calling us.

If the guy you're dating doesn't seem to be completely into you, or you feel the need to start "figuring him out", please consider the glorious thought that he might just not be that into you. And then free yourself to go find the one that is.

When a guy is into you, he lets you know it. He calls, he shows up, he wants to meet your friends, he can't keep his eyes and hands off you, and when it's time to have sex, he's more than overjoyed to oblige.

You know you deserve to have a great relationship.

Don't waste the pretty!

Men don't forget how much they like you, so put down the phone.

He's just not that into you if he's not calling you. Men know how to use the phone.

Oh sure, they say they're busy.They say that they don't have even a moment in their insanely busy day to pick up the phone. It was just THAT CRAZY. Bullcrap. With the advent of cell phones and speed dialing it is almost impossible NOT to call you.

If I were into you, you would be the bright spot in my horribly busy day. Which would be a day that I would never be too busy to call you.

Here's something to think about: Calling when you say you're going to is the very first brick in the house you are building of love and trust. If he can't lay this one stupid brick down, you ain't never gonna have a house, baby. And it's cold outside.

Missing someone is a sign of a healthy relationship. Not respecting your need to have some form of communication with him while he's away is not. Regardless of his dislike for talking on the phone, he should respect and care for you enough to call you, if only because he knows it will make you happy.

Men are NEVER too busy to get what they want.

If he's choosing not to make a simple effort that would put you at ease and bring harmony to a recurring fight, then he doesn't respect your feelings and needs.

"Hanging out" is NOT dating.

THE IT'S BETTER THAN NOTHING EXCUSE:
Really? Is better than nothing what we're going for now? I was hoping for at least a lot better than nothing. Or perhaps even something. Have you lost your marbles? Why should you feel honored for getting scraps of his time? Just because he's busy doesn't make him more valuable. "Busy" does not mean "better".

I know. Every two weeks, once a month, seeing someone, having a little love and affection may help you get through the day or the week or the month- but will it get you through a lifetime?

I don't want to be "sort of dating" someone. I don't want to be "sort of hanging out" with someone. I don't want to spend a lot of my energy suppressing all my feelings so I appear uninvolved. I want to be involved. I want to be sleeping with someone I know I'll see again because they've already demonstrated to me that they're trustworthy and honorable- and INTO ME.

If you don't know where the relationship is going, it's okay to pull over and ask.

There is a guy out there that will tell everyone that he's your boyfriend. Quit goofing around and go find him.

I know it's nice to have a companionship and wake up with somebody that you really like, but that's what pets are for. Pets are God's way of saying, "Don't lower the bar because you're lonely."

We deserve more than a slumber party.

Monday, September 11, 2006

Cristina's Computerized Painting of Our Summer in Lincolnton

Cristina Leon was so incredibly bored one day in the summer of 2006 that she created this amazing masterpiece via Paint, yes.. the rinky dink accessory from Microsoft Office. A-MAZING! check out the detail, and the descriptions! hahaha. this is why i love her... (click the picture for more details!)

Monday, May 29, 2006

What Every Woman Should Have & Know

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:

  • one old love she can imagine going back to and one who reminds her how far she has come...
  • enough money within her control to move out & rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to
  • something perfect to wear if an employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour
  • a youth she's content to leave behind
  • a past juicy enough she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age
  • a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra
  • one friend who always makes her laugh and one who lets her cry
  • a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family
  • eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored
  • a feeling of control over her destiny


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
  • how to fall in love without losing herself
  • how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship...AND how to change a tire!!!
  • when to try harder & when to walk away
  • that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents
  • that her childhood may not have been perfect but it's over
  • what she would and wouldn't do for love and more
  • how to live alone even if she doesn't like it
  • whom she CAN trust, whom she CAN'T trust, and why she shouldn't take it personally
  • where to go...whether it be her best friend's kitchen table or a charming inn in the woods...when her soul needs soothing
  • what she can and can't accomplish in a day, month, and year.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

What Men Want You To Know

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story.
(I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear "the rules" From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Men ARE not mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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