30 Blogs in 30 Days: Day 4: 10 Things I Would Say to my 16-Year-Old Self

This is a pretty interesting one!

Hmm... let's see... what was I doing when I was 16???

In September of 2003, I was starting my junior year of high school, so "16" was basically my junior year & the summer after.

Alex and I were on and off {of course} and I had some pretty great times with some pretty great friends.

Here's some random pics from my 16-year-old days...

Golfing with Alex for his 18th birthday

"Fab 4" night of trouble... 

There's a funny story that goes with the picture above.

I will sum it up with a Facebook photo comment from Summer (2nd from the right):

"hahahahahahahaha...i still can see you flipping out of the back of the truck..hahaha...and the car coming and you almost getting ran over...i thought you were dead...but of course im glad you're ok and everything but you know that was the funniest thing ever when you look back on it...lol" 

Good times, y'all, good times...

My 16th Birthday... at Hooters after the football game, lol

Oh you know, riding around ;) Taking pictures...
With that old Nokia phone- everyone who was cool had one ;) 

Junior Girls Christmas Party at my house

Christmas dance
I was in a "bold" phase

Homecoming Pep Rally with Alex
Look how young & skinny we were!

Softball girlies :) 

When you want a specific tan line, you wear 2 bathing suits.
You can do that when you're skinny.

My future college roomie!! Who knew?! :)

My twinsie, Meredith ♥

I definitely just scrounged through my old Webshots account and whatever is left of my Facebook pictures from this "era" and reminisced for about an hour. {Way to be productive, Nicole!} 

Oh, yeah....10 things I would tell my 16-year-old self.... 

1. You've got it, so flaunt it! You will start taking Depo-Provera next year, and your body will never like you again. 
2. I know you think you're overweight, but YOU. ARE. NOT. You can't compare your body to your peers' bodies. You wanna compare it to something? Compare it to your OWN body, 8 years later. You'll think twice and want to wear bikinis everywhere you go! 
3. Your hair was cute short. But at some point, please let it grow long.
4. You look beautiful without a ton of makeup! 
5. You're going to have fun. Things are going to get crazy. Live it up. You'll grow more cautious later. 
6. When Alex gets super controlling and psycho on you, don't call him. "It's meant to be," so don't call him. He'll act like he won't miss you, because he's young and big and bad, but do your own things. He'll miss you a lot. And he'll be a much better man eight years later, so, do what you've gotta do. 
7. Realize how lucky you are. You're surrounded by so many awesome things, memories, and people! Not everyone's so lucky.
8. Hoes before bros. 
9. Learn how to study, PLEASE. And get better grades. You're too smart to get lower grades just because you're lazy. 
10. Family is important too. 

*****

Stay tuned for Day 5: Five Things That Make You Most Happiest Right Now

Click to see my other blogs from 30 Blogs in 30 Days.

Beyonce, Jay-Z, Blue Ivy & others: The SNL spoof

This made me laugh today, as I lay in the bed on this rainy Sunday afternoon with a headache, TRYING to fill out paperwork on lowering my student loan payments.

The Beyonce impersonation is a bit off but the Jay-Z impersonation is spot on!! The Taylor Swift impersonation is funny too...and y'all know that's my girl!! This seriously made me "LOL" so I hope you all can enjoy it too. :)

Happy Sunday!!

Cross your fingers extra hard for {enough} snow tonight!! ;)

200 lbs

So, last week I hit up the gym 3 times! {This may not be a big deal to you- but it is to me. I haven't had time to think about going to a gym this past semester, let along actually GOING. So this is an accomplishment for me.} The first time I went I ran a mile straight! {I don't know that I could do that again, lol, but some magic power took over me and I was able to do it.} & I've been doing cardio & weights all three days. I thought, SURELY I've lost ONE pound by doing this, so, let me check the scale out...seeing one pound lost will motivate me more than seeing no pounds lost. 

Well, to my amazement, and horror, I stepped on the scale that I found in one of the boxes I unpacked last week. I put it in my room {on carpet- which MUST be the culprit} and it showed this:

Scared me half to death!!!!!!!!!

Note to readers: I do NOT weight 200 lbs! It was weighing myself on carpet that was the culprit {I was right} but if that doesn't scare you to the gym, I don't know what will!! I am way too short {5'1" on a good day} to gain one more pound. And plus, I have a LOT of jeans and pants I can wear if I drop a size or two! So that's my motivation. The number's really not important to me, at all, but if the number drops, I know my pant size will too. :)

Now that I know it's a sick sick joke, I find it funny enough of a story to share. :) 

Happy Memorial Day peoples!

WHAT THA....?!?!?!

So, funny story. Mawmaw gave me a "fruit basket"...you know, fruit IN a basket. Probably in an attempt to get it off my counter {like everything but the kitchen sink's not already ON my counter} I put the fruit basket on top of the refrigerator. Now you know that you can leave a banana out on the counter for a total of like two seconds before you start to get fruit flies. SOO gross! And WHERE do those things come from?!?! Well, if you see fruit flies, you know to get rid of the fruit.

But, what happens if you don't see fruit flies?
Or smell anything?
Or remember that your fruit basket is on top of the refrigerator?

Well, if you forget, for as long as I did, you get a little something like this:

What tha....?!?! Seriously, I don't know what is yellow underneath. But the apples were a smidge rotten and yes, that's my banana. It totally shrunk, shriveled up, and turned black as night. I seriously must have magic walls or something because ANY OTHER TIME I would have vomited from the smell alone.

But since I didn't, it makes for a funny gross picture and story to tell. :)

BLONDE MOMENT!

HAHA! It's always good to laugh at yourself every once in a while. I will share my latest blonde moment with you!

So, Laura posted a blog talking about Groupon. My friend Meredith introduced the idea to me this past summer, but I forgot about it. I thought there might be some good deals to try on there, so I thought, what the heck! & I signed up for their free daily e-mails with deals! Well, at the bottom of the daily deal I was reading it said "The Groupon Guide to: Writing a Check." Then it showed a picture of a check and a how-to blurb on check writing. Knowing how to write a check (thank you, Lincolnton Middle School!), I just scrolled down the screen. Then I saw this:

4. $: This one is obvious—circle the dollar sign if you want your intended recipient to receive some money.

Now! Wait a minute! For real?!?! How have I been writing checks for 8 years and NOT known this?? Seriously?? I thought, "I have NEVER done this!" ... I don't know that I've ever written a check to someone for more than I owe them to receive cash back, but still... HOW did I not know this?!?!

And then I continued to read.... the blurb looked a little something like this...

The Groupon Guide to: Writing a Check

Thanks to the popularity of credit cards, many colleges no longer offer a major in filling out checks. Here's a guide:

1. Your Address: Similar to how you should dress for the job you want, your checks should list the address you wish you had. This is why most checks list the White House or an imagined attic above a McDonald's as the address.
2. Date: If you would like to date the person you are sending money to, write yes on this line.
3. Payable to the Order of: Write the name of the secret religious or fraternal order you want the money to go to on this line.
4. $: This one is obvious—circle the dollar sign if you want your intended recipient to receive some money.
5. MP: Write the name of your favorite member of Parliament on this line. If your check clears, this counts as voting for him.
6. Number Line: This string of digits is the maximum amount you can write a check for.

HAHAHAHA! Thanks, Groupon, for the laugh...at myself!

World War II...as told by this awesome little girl

Here's another from the fabulous blakekelly0 of YouTube. {Did you miss the first one? Click here.} This little girl would keep. me. entertained! and that is for sure! For as young as she is, she seems to be fairly intelligent. Misinformed perhaps...but she definitely has a great imagination!! :)

In this one, she's explaining World War II to us...

Some great quotes from this one are:

• "The EGYPTIANS! . oh wait, that was wrong..."
• "The germans...in World War II...I mean three! Sorry, three!"
• "They all went, 'Okay, we'll do that!'"
• "And all the Egyptians died because the sun was making them SO HOT."
• "The Army guys made their own houses out of clothes, and then they made clothes, out of sewings."
• "And the kid, who was very, very, very BIG......she was four..."

Check it out for yourself!!

Optical Illusion

When you first look at this picture you see Albert Einstein.
Stand 15 ft. away from the picture and who do you see?

 

Marilyn Monroe! 

"Now what do you think about the reliability of an eyewitness testimony?" the forwarded email asks.

I am just a dork who loves optical illusions! :) .. and I don't think the illusion requires 15 feet either, but you get the idea!

texts from last night

So I read some funny texts from last night & found some that I could totally guess who they came from! The site's usually filled with inappropriate texts, but some are just too funny not to share! I searched local area codes & this is what I found:

980: I am making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
704: oh, you finally did the dishes then?
980: no, bought new ones
---I could soo see me saying that!---

704: soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her

704: he looks like a really good dad on facebook

704: I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead

704: You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"

704: One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+

704: How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a "blasty"

980: How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?

980: you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took me 15 minutes to read them all.

828: I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.