Overwhelmed & thankful

I am overwhelmed.

Of course I am overwhelmed with work. What's new?

But- I'm also overwhelmed in a whole other amazing way!

I am finding myself surrounded by so many giving people who are willing to do whatever they can to help make sure our special day is perfect. I have some amazing showers lined up and from what I can tell, a very fun and original bachelorette party weekend! My bridesmaids are being so amazing and helpful. I cannot wait to have all my besties together under one roof!!

I have turned Alex into a wedding-planning helper and he is doing a great job! He has found us a honeymoon spot & it's going to be a surprise for me! I cannot wait to spend a week in paradise with my husband!!! Ahhhhh!!!

And I am just so overwhelmed about how God is working to prove to me that no matter what, our wedding day is going to be beautiful and filled with love! Of course I have a million details to stress about but God keeps showing me over, and over, and over again that He is handling all those details, and I need to quit freaking out.

I am so thankful for everyone who is offering to help us....whether it's financially, throwing showers, decorating, prayer, with alterations, giving us helpful tips, and putting in their time to be a part of our wedding! I cannot believe it'll be here in less than two months and I just hope I can get things ironed out enough to sit back, relax, and enjoy the rest of this season. I have faith that it'll all get done, look great, and be a night we will never forget! We are so blessed to have so many family & friends supporting us. We are also so blessed because God is showering us with so many blessings along the way & we are so undeserving!! The little blessings along the way just showed me that even if I had all the money in the world and the best wedding planner ever, things could still go wrong and I just need to step back and give God my wedding day and let Him handle it. He is so much better at the little details than I am ;)

I am overwhelmed and I am glad. ♥

10,000 viewers!!!

How did I miss this event??

I have been waiting on this event since my blog hit 1,000 viewers.

I took a glimpse and realized that sometime in the last week, my blog has hit

10,000

viewERS!!!!

This is a big deal to me...not quite sure why, but it is so I will do a little internal celebrating tonight! 

I started counting viewers in January 2010 but the website I use to count my statistics only shows me the past 52 weeks' information. Dumb. I don't know how many people viewed my blog before January 2010, but knowing that I started counting after I started my blog makes my heart smile knowing the number is even higher than it says! 

I selected the setting to count the number of individual people that visit my blog, not the number of times the public views my blog... that way I can say this many PEOPLE have seen it- and that just makes it a little more awesome!! 

Thank you, Blogger, for having a super convenient Pageviews link that gives you all kinds of stats on your blog.  I was curious, so I went to see which of my entries have gotten the most hits, and this is what I found:::

Thank you to all my friends and random people to have stumbled upon my blog! It's CRAZY to think that people from the USA, Russia, Canada, the United Kingdom, Germany, Denmark, the Philippines, Australia, Ukraine, and the Netherlands have viewed my blog!! 

Keep on comin' back y'all! And comment, comment, comment! I love to get random comments from people I didn't know knew my blog existed. If you're one of those people, click that FOLLOW button and stay connected!! ;) 

Hope during your season of waiting

I just wanted to remind those of you out there that have forgotten (while also reminding myself) that God is so so so good and when we think that we are missing out, it's just because He has a much more perfect plan for us.  We just see the here and now and often forget to look outside of our box and see how our disappointments could possibly be for the better. I vow to continue to try my hardest to keep the faith that God knows what He's doing and knows what's best for me more than I do.  Just when you think you can't take anymore, God finds a way to surprise you with the most richest blessings! Being patient, keeping faith, and (here's the kicker) attempting to not be so darn anxious while you wait is what pleases God the most. It also makes the ride a lot more bearable.

I hope that if you think you're missing out, or  you're bummed because something's not going your way, to please remember that God loves you and only wants what's best for you.  We often think we know what's best for us, but we don't. We really don't.

The following are some Bible verses and random quotes that I had found years ago (I'm sure it was during a time when Alex and I were not dating and I was having a hard time), but I just found so much hope in Bible verses and quotes. I still do.  I think they're super relatable and  say words that you often can't come up with yourself.  My current issues of waiting does not have anything to do with Alex. (So now y'all, this doesn't have to do with marriage, him proposing, anything of that nature. So hold the comments if you will.)  But these are something I held highly at one point, and I know that someone out there will be able to use them today for whatever it is they're going through.  They all are pretty ambiguous, meaning that they aren't specific to one area. You could be able to apply them to any period of waiting that you're currently going through.  I hope this finds it's way to those who need it.  :-)

"God may not always give us answers, but he always gives us grace."

"Sometimes it's best to forget how you feel and remember what you deserve." 

I understand that it's not understandable; only You, Lord, know EVERYTHING.

The bigger picture is so much more beautiful. ♥

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.

In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." -Proverbs 3:5-6

"Faith is being sure of what we hope for but certain of what we do not see." -Hebrews 11:1

"Beginnings are scary. Endings are usually sad, but it's what's in the middle that counts.

So, when you find yourself at the beginning, just give hope a chance to float up. And it will." -Hope Floats

"Waiting for God's perfect timing can save you years of heartbreak.

Remember, God is faithful and always keeps His promises...even if you have to wait."

"Always remember, it's not what He's keeping from you, it's what He's SAVING FOR you."

Sweet Surprises

Seriously, this is so unlike my life- but I have felt the love lately!! I have felt so blessed, surrounded by such positive, uplifting, encouraging people in my life. I recently talked about my girlfriends, but today I want to give a shout out to my fabulous co-workers.

As you probably know, I passed my NCE (National Counselors Examination). That was a Friday & I took the day off of work to take my test in the morning and to head to the mountains for one of my best friend's weddings.

Well, Monday morning when I got to work, this was on my desk:

That in itself was so nice of them to do! I felt so happy seeing that. Everyone congratulated me and we went out to lunch to celebrate me passing the NCE and a co-worker's birthday! It's not often most of us get to take off work for an hour, together, so that was nice! Then at the end of the day I got a surprise!

Some nice-smelling goodies from Bath & Body Works & a card signed from everyone in the office!!

Seriously, how sweet is that?! I am so blessed to work with such great people.

I often whine & gripe about things that annoy me....so I thought I would take this time to remind people that there are nice people left in thsi world...and I am lucky enough to get to work with them!! :) Thank you, Lord!

My Week in Pictures

So I got a little busy this past week. So busy that I haven't blogged in 10 days, except for the prayer request for Ravonda. But I have been attempting to keep up with my 365 project, so, here is a review in pictures of my last ten days.

January 14th, went out to eat with Alex & his parents and I was introduced to the best salad ever made...

I don't remember what I did last Saturday but it was obviously not very eventful since my picture of the day is a picture of a fab Columbia rain jacket I got at Goodwill for less than FIVE dollars! The tags were still on it & everything! It was an $80ish jacket I do believe the tag said! Talk about a great deal! Can't wait until it's warm enough to wear it!

Sunday I gave my friend Ingrid a Mary Kay facial! She tried & loved our mineral foundation! Girls, you've gotta try it if you haven't already!

January 17th I was at home, enjoying every minute of it. This picture frame sits on my empty dresser at Mawmaw & Pawpaw's in my room. I got this for them for Christmas and love it! The picture on my Pawpaw giving me a kiss when I was a baby & then the other two are older pictures of my grandparents. The one on the right is one of my favorites! "All because two people fell in love." ♥

Tuesday: Showing off another piece of evidence that I am still in that animal print phase.

Wednesday: took down some Christmas decorations & added some "winter" decorations to my kitchen table! $1 each at The Dollar Tree...you know it!!

Thursday: This is one of the only good things about getting up this early for anything...seeing the sun rise! I saw it every day I went to my internship this week. It really puts you in a great mood that early in the morning! :)

Friday I got my first Mary Kay commission check in the mail! It was small but it reminded me of all the opportunities I have ahead of me in this business if I will only put forth some effort!

Saturday I went to visit the amazing Ravonda Mauldin at the Hospice house she is staying in. I got to visit with her & her daughter Alana (pictured)- who is one of the sweetest girls ever! Ravonda is struggling and her health is failing, but I can not tell you the joy it brought to my heart to add a smile to her face and make her laugh in her moments of awareness. Lord, thank you for that.

Sunday had the day free, which rarely happens, so I took immediate advantage of the opportunity to go visit my grandmother & some of my family "for Christmas." I love this woman! She's a mess!

I am excited to say that this week is over, I am going to bed, and best of all...I will NOT be waking up at 5:30 in the morning! I am not even going to set my alarm!! Best feeling ever!! Now, watch me get up early just out of habit now....Stay tuned! ;)

it's the small things....

This wasn't a New Years resolution for me, although it may seem like one....but I am doing something I should have been doing for years. I am changing the way I look at certain situations and finding the small blessings that God provides me each day! Sounds simple, but at certain times it's hard to do- but don't worry...God has blessed me time and time again for it. I feel like I should journal these things each and every day so I can go back and look at what I usually would have gotten ill at, and then saw how God turned the situation into blessings in disguise! However, let's be realistic. I always start a journal & never continue it. Why? I don't know because I think the idea is awesome. Maybe I don't do it until I'm sleepy, or maybe I get to writing too  much then get overwhelmed, maybe I just forget about it, or maybe, just maybe, I am too lazy. Either way, I *think* about journaling, but since I don't actually journal, I am hoping I keep a good memory of God's daily mercies. And like I said....it's the small things!! For example, yesterday I was a little ill at a friend, but reminded myself to be empathetic. When I did that, I realized the blessing in things not going exactly my way and learned I will benefit more from this thing that made me ill in the first place. Thanking God for this thing was the right thing to do. He was behind it all. He is looking after me and my best interests and I must always remember that. And then, I went into Office Max to print my fabulous Mary Kay director, Dana Andrews, her planner and the guy behind the counter asked me if I had my Mary Kay discount card. Not having a clue what he was talking about, he told me that Mary Kay consultants get {pretty nice} discount at Office Max!! That is AWESOME news!! I am always loving a discount...and it comes in handy with my new planner business! ;) I feel like that was a {not so} random blessing!! It's not huge news, but it was happy news that  brightened my day! I am excited to see what this day will bring!!

Hickory Girlfriends

Last night I hosted a Mary Kay party for a friend, Dana. She's working towards her pink Cadillac. First let me say that I hate hosting parties. Not parties in general, that I would enjoy, but I dislike making people feel obligated to come and buy something. It's okay that I say this because I made that very clear to Dana multiple times. She's a trooper though and insisted I host a party anyways. Being so determined is how you become successful in the Mary Kay business I'm sure. I only invited about 9 or 10 girls & five showed up! I know the others would have came if they could have and I know everyone's got a million things going on. Which is why I was so thankful to have five girls show up! They didn't have to buy anything, but they did {probably because Mary Kay is so fabulous}. It's the fact that they took time out of their busy lives to join me at my party that made me so grateful for such great friends!

I am extremely grateful for the friends that I have made in Hickory. I love chatting, laughing, venting, MTV nights, walking around campus, & celebrating with them all! I really didn't know anyone when I moved to Hickory and now I feel so thankful that I have made girlfriends.

Girlfriends are vital to a girl's sanity.

I wish I had a pic with you all... We need a photo opp ASAP :) xoxo ♥

Vacation + I am a Godmother!! :)

I had a GREAT time during my MUCH needed vacay to "Wilmington" to stay with Lindsey & Rhine! I am absolutely in love with their house & all their home decor. Not to mention being so close to the BEACH! I had such a great time...they were the best hosts! Not to mention I was asked to be their future child's Godmother!! During breakfast on Friday they gave me a present and it was the cutest Godmother coffee mug with an adorable quote on it (I'll have to take a pic & post it)... as I opened up the present I cried!! :) Then Rhine preceded to tell me how large of a responsibility being a MARINE Godmother was, and then why they were so glad I accepted!! I am so blessed to have such great friends who think so highly of me. I just wish Alex could have been there with me. {Somebody's gotta stay home and make that money though, I guess!} I got some really cute stuff $hopping in the cute local stores and got to work on my tan for two days while laying out on the beach! I also attended their church Sunday morning, Scott's Hill Baptist Church-- which I LOVED! They are doing a series on FAQ {Frequently Asked Questions about Christianity} and it was hilarious, educational, Biblically based, and intriguing....all at the same time! The worship service was AWESOME too...I felt like I was at a Christian concert!!

Needless to say...the drive home was a long one! :( I can't wait to come back and visit them and my new baby Godson!! I would say his name but, I don't think they've entirely agreed on one quite yet!

I miss the breezy beach already!!

Food for thought: Forgiveness

Then Peter came up to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times must I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I'll tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times." -Matthew 18:21-22

Forgiveness has really been a key issue in my life lately. I go back to this verse when I am feeling defeated by others, contemplating forgiveness. I am human! I sin! I sometimes have to THINK about forgiving people, wondering if they are worthy of my forgiveness, time, and emotion. I have to remember that the exact wording of this verse is very important: I must forgive my brother (everyone) when they sin against me. Sometimes I get so bogged down because "people" aren't doing the right thing. I get mad when others make stupid choices, causing grief for those closest to them, myself included at times. I take it all personally. I've even been known to hold a grudge or two in my time {believe it or not, HA!} My thought process is flawed because simply: I am human. However, I can not use my "humanness" as justification for continuing to live in sin. I can and should only forgive those that have sinned against me. If others are sinning against others or against God, I need to pray for them. I should not take it personally or hold a grudge. If I do, then *I* am the one needing forgiveness! They have not sinned against me, therefore, forgiveness from me is not needed. {Gosh I hope my rambling is making sense.}

This passage really opened my eyes...

1 John:
1:5: This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in Him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with Him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and His word has no place in our lives.

2:1: My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world. We know that we have come to know him if we obey his commands. The man who says, "I know him," but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But if anyone obeys his word, God's love is truly made complete in him.

This is how we know we are in him: Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did.

That pretty much sums it up for me. One thing I can say for myself is {as you can also see above} I have never claimed to be perfect. I will shout it from the rooftops that I am NOT perfect! I am far from it actually and like everyone else, have my good days and have my bad days. Lucky for me, I am saved by the love and grace of Jesus Christ. The passage above reminds me that because I am a Christian, and have accepted Christ as my Savior, then when I do have my "bad days," my heavenly Father goes to bat for me. He speaks to HIS father on MY behalf, asking that I be forgiven. What an amazing thought! What an amazing thing! What an amazing Savior I have!

Forgiving one another is the hardest thing to do and the most beneficial. As God's chosen people we are to forgive all {did you hear that? ALL} grievances we have between one another because of the example set forth to us by Christ.

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. -Colossians 3:12-14

and lastly....

And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him and let it drop (leave it, let it go), in order that your Father Who is in heaven may also forgive you your [own] failings and shortcomings and let them drop. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your failings and shortcomings. -Mark 11:25-26, Amplified

This is why it is SO important and beneficial for us to forgive. Jesus can not do us that mighty favor by going to bat for us when we have our bad days if we have hate in our hearts, if we are holding grudges, if we are choosing to not forgive someone, for anything, no matter what. As 1st John says, if we are living in Him, we must walk as Jesus did (forgivingly). I personally do not want to sacrifice MY forgiveness, at the cost of living a life full of hate. Doesn't make sense at all to me why anyone would.

If you are choosing to hold a grudge, not forgiving someone, for anything, reconsider. The price is far too high and not even close to worth it, especially when you think about how trivial some of your grievances are. Let your light shine! Do not choose to be held captive in the darkness for another minute.

It's never too late
to turn everything around.

Yet I will rejoice...

I never {never say never} usually don't use my blog for venting personal emotions; however, tonight's different. I don't know why, but I feel like blogging will somehow be therapeutic for me. So, read this, or don't...I don't care today. 

That is how I started this super long venting blog, before I was smacked in the face with my most recent post on ten minutes to get you through your day.  The whole point of it really was,

"No matter what, yet I will rejoice in the Lord!"

The devotion referred to Habakkuk 3:17-18, which says...

"Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD; I will take joy in the God of my salvation."

I like to think of it as...

though I'm having a bad hair day

though my makeup looks like crap

though I have tons of school loans to pay off

though I don't make a lot of money

though I have way too much school work to do for the summertime

though people I love are fighting

though friends and children of my friends are dying

though I am no longer friends with those who I used to be the closest with

though none of my best girlfriends live anywhere near me

though I still have a long way to go before I graduate and can start a new life

though I found an earwig on my pillow!!

though I feel defeated

though I feel jealous

though I feel discontent

though I feel broken...

yet I will rejoice in the LORD;

I will take joy in the God of my salvation.

I really needed that reality check. I have it good. I need to watch Jessica's Daily Affirmation again. And since I can't sleep, and don't feel like beginning reading for another psychopathology quiz right now at 1:30 AM, I think I'll start a new {probably annoying to you} blog listing things I am thankful for. That ought to put things into perspective for me. Either way, I've gotta get out of this rut the Devil worked on me. I won't let him defeat me! I am kind of excited though, because that just means the Lord has something in store for me, and the Devil is trying to defeat me beforehand... I will keep my eyes and heart open, ready to receive His blessings!  Stay tuned!

"Gilding the Lily"

Tonight, after showering, moisturizing, finding something to wear, curling my hair, and playing with my new makeup, my Mawmaw comes into my room and just peaks her head in and says, "You're gilding the lily." Of course I immediately asked her, "What does that even mean?" and the response I got was, "Figure it out."

So, I googled it. :)


gild ¹ (gld)

tr.v. gild·ed or gilt (glt), gild·ing, gilds

1. To cover with or as if with a thin layer of gold.

2. To give an often deceptively attractive or improved appearance to.

3. Archaic To smear with blood.

Idiom:

gild the lily

1. To adorn unnecessarily something already beautiful.

2. To make superfluous additions to what is already complete.

She is the absolute best. I love her so much. I'm so glad God decided to bless me with the sweetest Mawmaw in the world! It's nice to receive compliments every now and then. Especially ones that make your heart smile. :)

I just thought I'd share with you all what "gilding the lily" meant, in case you were like me and had no clue!  

Reflecting on 2009

Where did 2009 go? Man it flew by! I say that...but a lot happened in 2009! I learned so many things this past year. I probably say that every year, but, I DO mean it! :) I was also blessed tremendously in 2009. Looking back, I can't even begin to tell you all the things God did for me. (But, I'll try!) First and foremost, God's timing could not be more perfect! I can not express how lucky I am to have had Him place Alex back into my life, for good! I am (still) so in love with that man of God & I can not wait to see what 2010 has in store for us! Alex graduated in May and has been searching for a job at least since then! He's been unsuccessful in finding a job and I am so proud of him. He keeps his head up and has the most positive attitude. He knows that God has something perfect for him out there and it's only a matter of time before He presents Alex with that opportunity. Until then, God has provided various odd jobs for him to provide him some gas money at least! That boy comes to Hickory ALL the time and I am SO appreciative!! During this time though, Alex has searched after the heart of his Father and has dove into the Word of the Lord and boy does it show! I am on a daily basis proud of the man he is, and the man he is turning into. I do believe that with the help of the Lord, people CAN change. As you all know, Alex & I have had our ups and downs, times together and times apart. Throughout it all, I've learned to stay true to your heart and that (how cliche is this?) "if it's meant to be, IT WILL BE." Either way, the past is in the past now and 2009 was a great year for us, and again, I can't wait to see what 2010 has in store for us!

Now, if you know me, you know that I have to make that money! I do not have the luxury of being able to take "time off" or anything of the sort. Bills have to be paid, right? The Lord has always been successful providing me employment and 2009 was NO exception! It all started in JANUARY and by the last week of JULY, the Lord has answered my prayers!! It was stressful but I learned that I need to stay faithful and the Lord WILL provide! In the mean time, God provided me temporary jobs to pay the bills & gain some learning experiences! I am very appreciative of all the people that prayed for me during that time. It obviously helped! I have never loved a job more!

Meet my staff! I think this pic is such an exact replica of our personalities!

 and meet my fellow RDs:

And lastly, learning experiences...I mentioned those, right? They definitely were a definitive part of 2009 and I will be forever grateful for those as well! I won't go into what all I learned, but I can tell you that I will take everything I learned from the beginning to the end of the past year and use it in the upcoming year(s).

I don't believe in New Years resolutions. If I ever made them, they didn't work out. I just want to work on making this year & every year after that better! My first Facebook photo album of the year is titled, "making 2010 the best year ever.." & that's simply what I'm doing! I'm going to do some prioritizing, some sifting, and work on devoting my time & energy into what helps me do that. I'm focusing on God, my family, Alex, & my true friends. If I do that, everything else will fall into place. I'm sure of it. :)

The school part of graduate school--

Omgosh. Grad school is definitely doing a job job kicking my butt right now.

I have learned that you can't just take pride in finalizing your to-do list. You have to get things done so your to-do list gets smaller or smaller. The thing with me is, I'll keep adding crap to the list. Just so I won't forget down the road.

My to-do list currently has on it: work on paper due next week and finish painting apartment (which we all know probably won't happen until the summer). Who am I kidding?

I do take pride in the fact that our STUPID paper was completed tonight at 11pm. It's due tomorrow. Figures. It's so hard to get us all together. We are all adults, living individual lives. It's not like undergrad when the majority of students don't have full time jobs, or children, or spouses. It is seriously difficult to get a group of 4 or 5 of us together to work on a group project. But we did it! We spent 7 hours together this work working on it...not counting the time we worked on it individually. Group papers are the worst I think. Ahh but it's DONE! :-D

November 18th is a big day for me. I have tons of crap due that day - tons! Including a paper on a book I haven't read yet. (Date check - yes, it's Nov 13th!) I heard it's a good one though ... one about the experiences of living in a concentration camp during WWII. I've been told the main point of the book is "it's not about what happens to you, but how you react to what happens to you" so .. I'm sure I'll finish it quickly! I better, huh?!

After that I'll only have a couple more assignments due for the semester and the Monday & Tuesday before Thanksgiving I'll get TWO out of 3 of my FINALS to start completing. Grad school finals are awesome. Yeah, they're cumulative, which sucks, but they're take home, open book essay finals! The sooner I start, the sooner I'll get done .. which means the sooner I can get back to stalking people on Facebook! ;) juuuuuuuuuust kidding. (right.) No, but I do miss it...

On a different note - I registered for classes already! November 9th. I thought that was kinda early but maybe I'm wrong. I am taking 3 classes right now (9 hours), all of which are kicking my butt, but to my defense, only because I procrastinated. So what do I do? I sign up for FOUR next semester! You know me, trying to get out of school as soon as I can! At the going rate I'll graduate December of 2011. Gah, that seems forever away but I'm sure it'll be here before I know it. Anyways, four classes. I was going to take a week-long class in December on spirituality but I think I'll take that time to go home and have a break with my family. Oh! AND .. one of those classes next semester is only 3 weekends long. How awesome is that? 3 weekends and I'm done. Grad school DOES have its perks!

I am so blessed to be here. I try to thank God every day for the job He gave me here and for the opportunity to further my education, for free, because otherwise I'd just have a Psychology degree and I'd either be doing something I hate or working a job that doesn't require a college education. He DEFINITELY was keeping His eye out for me! I have no doubt in my mind. Thank you, Lord! :)

Welcome to Hickory, NC!

Ahh! My sleep schedule is SO messed up! I'll probably end up blogging late at night while I have a ton of energy. Living back in the residence halls have really screwed up my already pretty messed up sleep schedule. And I really reallly really wish I'd work on that more- because it really messes up your day!

About that---as most of you know, I've moved to Hickory, NC. I got a great job too! I am now a Resident Director at Lenoir-Rhyne University. I live in an apartment in Isenhour Hall on campus, one of the primarily freshmen "dorms." (Speaking of my apartment, it was a definite fixer-upper and I took before and after pictures! I'll have to share them another day!) Anyways, my job is to primarily oversee the RAs in the building (who, by the way are SUCH an awesome staff!) and the building itself, and handle any mishaps that happen along the way. Let me tell you, I LOVE IT! Isenhour Hall is crazy. My residents are crazy and I'm enjoying getting to know them this year. I hate hate hate the sound of my doorbell but I don't mind it when I hear it at 2 in the morning if someone is having issues.  It's such a great job to have while I work on my Masters. I can use what I learn in classes immediately and directly with students, which is great!

Again, in case you hadn't heard, I'm working here at LR on my Masters in Counseling. I couldn't decide which type of counseling I wanted to do once I had my Masters and I was seriously struggling with that decision. Usually, graduate schools have you decide which type of counseling you want to pursue: agency/community or school. Well, long story short: Lenoir-Rhyne has an awesome program that lets you do both! So, I added 12 hours to my course load and will be able to pursue a counseling career in either some type of community counseling or in a school! With the economy the way it is, the more doors I'll be able to open the better! And then there's the fact that I still have no idea what I actually WANT to do! So, I have about 2 years to figure it out. :)

I think I've figured that I'll graduate in August or December of 2011. I took two classes this summer and plan to take one in December. It's crazy--those 3 classes add up to only a total of 16 days but those 3 classes alone will knock a whole SEMESTER off my graduation date! You know me....trying to get in and out as soon as possible so I can move on to the next stage! :) However, my LR experience is a lot different from my experience in undergrad at Appalachian. I may blog about that later. :) Therefore I wouldn't mind staying longer if I had to/could. Ok, I've lived here like TWO months...I need to stop. I'm hoping things don't change but I need to stop counting my chickens. Hopefully I'll remember to keep blogging and give you an update on it later on, once I've experienced it all a little more.

Dreams & the Devil, my personal story...

So, you may or may not have heard me talk about this before but, either way, I have an update.

So you know how some people dream, and sometimes they remember their dreams and sometimes they don't? Well, I can't remember a time when I have remembered a "good" dream. If I remember a dream, it's because it probably scarred me for life. I mean, I know all about REM sleep, and I know I dream multiple dreams a night. However, if I realize I'm dreaming, if I'm awoken from a dream, or if I even remember a dream-- it's because it scared the living daylights out of me.

My nightmares usually involve someone I love dying, or someone trying to kill me, or the world ending. Crazy! Right?? But you can see how this would freak me out now...

Having lunch with a friend one day, we got on the topic of dreams and I was telling them about my nightmares. She asked me if I've always had them, or if they recently started occurring. I got to thinking about it... I thought they had recently began occurring throughout the past couple years or so, which had been a pretty tough time for me. Once I starting thinking back, it hit me! I had been suffering from these nightmares since I can remember. (Ironic, ha).

A long time ago my family used to live in Iron Station, NC. We moved out of that house when I was in the 2nd grade, therefore I figured out that I started having recurring nightmares somewhere between the ages of 3 and 7. I vividly remember not wanting to go to sleep in fear of having another nightmare. My brother, Pat, & I shared a bedroom at the time and I remember my dad putting me to sleep in my bed. He picked one of Pat's toys up off the floor-- a foot-tall, hard as a rock Ninja Turtle-- & I remember him telling me that if I slept with the Ninja Turtle, he'd fight off my bad dreams.

Do y'all know how long I slept with that Ninja Turtle? I was paranoid! I slept with it every night until finally my parents realized that my "comfort item" wasn't a blanket or a stuffed animal, but a foot-tall, hard as a rock Ninja Turtle! They bought me this cat to replace the turtle. The movie "Andre" had just come out (the movie about a girl who raised a pet seal...y'all remember that?!) .. Well, I named the cat Andre and took that thing everywhere I spent the night. I TRULY believed that if that cat wasn't covered up in the bed next to me I would have a bad dream. I honestly, sadly to say, slept with that thing PROBABLY until I was in 8th grade. I remember in middle school doing nightly experiments, sleeping with the cat and not sleeping with the cat, to see if I would have a nightmare or not. I promise you-- if that cat was not by my side, I had a nightmare, sure as the devil! That freaked me out and that is how I justify to myself why I slept with the cat until I was in the 8th grade.

Now I can't remember why I quit sleeping with the cat, and I couldn't even tell you where it is today (which saddens me a bit)...but I'm sure it had something to do with me entering high school. It also might have something to do with the fact that one night I spent the night at Ashleigh Woody's house and forgot the cat. I called my mom, freaking out, and asked her to come bring it to me. She for whatever reason wouldn't, and I could hear my dad joking in the background saying, "here kitty kitty...", acting like he was going to kill my cat or something horrible. I don't know, but I remember getting really upset, and afterwards I probably just wondered why in the world I was getting so upset over a stuffed cat!

Either way, (sorry--this story's getting longer than I anticipated) I don't sleep with a comfort item and haven't since then. But, I still have these crazy nightmares! I don't watch scary movies anymore because I'm sure they'll trigger some unconscious (or obviously conscious) fear of mine and I'll have nightmares for a month or something crazy.

Anywho-- some friends and I were talking about dream therapy at lunch the other day and I told them my crazy cat story. I told them how it was all in my head and if I slept with the cat growing up I never had a bad dream, but if I didn't then I would for sure have one.

A couple nights later, I couldn't sleep so I started reading my new Bible. It's a NIV & The Message Parallel Bible & I love it! Anyways, I just opened it up and started reading The Message.

PLEASE LOOK AT WHAT I FOUND---

"Dear friend, guard clear Thinking and common sense with your life; don't for a minute lose sight of them. They'll keep your soul alive and well, they'll keep you fit and attractive. You'll travel safely, you'll neither tire nor trip. **NOW HERE'S MY FAVORITE PART -->** You'll take afternoon naps without a worry, you'll enjoy a good night's sleep. NO NEED TO PANIC OVER ALARMS OR SURPRISES, OR PREDICTIONS THAT DOOMSDAY'S JUST AROUND THE CORNER, BECAUSE GOD WILL BE RIGHT THERE WITH YOU; HE'LL KEEP YOU SAFE AND SOUND." (Proverbs 3: 21-26, The Message)

Obviously that spoke right to my heart. I worry and I worry and I worry. I pray every night before I go to bed that the Lord blesses me with sweet dreams, or at least no nightmares. I try not to take dreams seriously but they honestly make me very anxious and weary. It's funny because the Lord says in the Bible NOT to anxious OR weary! The Devil attacks you, day and night, and obviously whether you are asleep or not. He'll find a way to get to you- He knows you're destined for great things and therefore will get a head start on attempting to bring you down whenever possible.

I now go to bed worry-free. I know the Lord is protecting me.
I'm sure some of you have experienced a similar situation. I'm sure some of you can relate. I just wanted to share this with you and let you know that God is in control. Give your life to Him and He will take that life-long burden off your shoulders. "Cast your anxieties on Him because He cares for you." :)

And if you made it all the way to the end, I appreciate you listening. :) Be blessed!

true love never dies

In 50 years I hope to be just as in love as my grandparents were today. :)

My Pawpaw told me about how my Mawmaw had red high heel shoes on when they first met, "and a red dress too!" ... and how he thought, "I'd like to marry a girl like that." ... and then he said "and I did! I got to marry a girl like that." ... awwwwwwww now HOW adorable is he?? Really??

Please note how he said he "GOT" to marry a girl like that. He considered it a privilege. And that my friend is how it should be...always.

She told me about when he proposed and how he still remembers certain special moments from thier past, like the time they first met, and how thoughtful that was of him.... She said, "People will never forget the thoughtful things you do for them." How true.

I am actually blessed to be dating a guy that remembers those little important things- the time we first held hands, the DATE we first kissed, the time we first cuddled, the first movie we watched, etc. etc. ... I am a lucky girl :)